


aloof

by meigeni



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Bullying, Drug Use, Flashbacks, Fluff, M/M, Mark and Johnny are Brothers, Panic Attacks, Slow Burn, Swearing, brief hyuck/yukhei, im sorry i love u mark, mark is an asshole plz, more tags to come, only for the beginning tho, platonic jaemin/hyuck, save hyuck plz, set in america cuz im a yeehaw american from chicago
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2019-11-08 07:54:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 3,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17977364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meigeni/pseuds/meigeni
Summary: The air was chilly for a summer night. People were standing on their lawns craving for a chance to gossip about the family of house 148 once again. The same house his ex best friend Lee Donghyuck lives in.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> 🤠 hello  
> hopefully i wont abandon this fic i thought of it out of nowhere LMAO
> 
> main inspo for the fic is heart eyes by coin but the actual song doesnt fit the fic until later *wink wonk*
> 
> I hope y'all like this plz comment 
> 
> #bringwinwinback2k19

red and blue.

The colors flashed wildly as they passed by Mark's bedroom window and stopped in the driveway of the house at the end of the street. The loud noise of the cop cars and ambulance woke up the the whole neighborhood, Mark and his family included. A soft sigh left his lips as he heard the floor boards outside his room shift with weight, a knock resounding in the room and a soft call of his name being heard by the boy.

"Hey Mark, you'd might want to come outside," his brother, Johnny, called out.

Mark rolled his eyes and slowly got up from his bed, quickly shuffling across the room and opening the door to join Johnny on the staircase before finally leaving the house right behind their parents.

The air was chilly for a summer night. People were standing on their lawns craving for a chance to gossip about the family of house 148 once again. The same house his ex best friend Lee Donghyuck lives in.

"Apparently- apparently his father tried to hurt them again... and hyuck was able to call the police this time," Johnny spoke behind him.

Mark let out a breath and rolled his eyes at the words, "what's new with that fucked up family? It's not like a simple 911 call is going to change the man or fix up Donghyuck. They'll both continue being fuck ups at the end of the day."

Maybe he was being harsh but what could he do about it? Donghyuck ruined any chance at a developing friendship with Mark when he got tied up in a web of lies he couldn't handle. Mark was disgusted at the thought or sight of the red haired boy and a continuous disturbance was not going to change that.

"Mark i understand you may not be friends with him anymore but have some decency-" Johnny began.

"No you have some decency, Johnny. You have no idea what he did and how his little plan backfired-" mark was interrupted by Johnny's forceful shove to his back.

"You listen here Mark Lee, you have absolutely no idea what went on with that boy and you have no right to accuse him of things he didn't want to tell you. By the way you're acting and speak of him i understand why he didn't want to tell you," Johnny said.

Mark thought for a moment.

what exactly happened to Donghyuck?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if it gets confusing please do tell me... I've been writing these chapters whenever i get inspiration because my writers block is really bad rn
> 
> It's gonna get more dramatic here on out🦍

Mark didn't sleep after he came back inside, guilt and confusion chewing on his insides as the name Donghyuck clouded his thoughts.  
Donghyuck was always... different. He was a bubbly person and always eager to make someone smile, until one day it had gotten too far.

Mark remembers seeing Donghyuck's father leaning over the younger boy, a hand wrapped around his throat and a hand high in the air ready to strike down onto the bronze skin of his best friend. He doesn't know why he took the fathers side when Donghyuck was obviously in danger. Donghyuck and his bruised neck with tears in his eyes as he climbed through marks window later the same day. Donghyuck and his shaking hands as Mark forced him back out of his bed room, screaming nonsense of "i don't want to see your disgusting face again" and "maybe one day you'll learn to respect your parents like i do" 

He doesn't have an excuse for leaving him alone when Donghyuck needed him the most.

 

X

 

_The Chicago skyline was absolutely beautiful._

_"Hey mark... do you think we'll ever get a chance to see the rest of what the world offers?" Donghyuck asked._

_Mark thought for a moment, "i don't know what else the world would offer me if it's not you."_

_Donghyuck didn't reply._

 

X

 

It's been a week since the incident at Donghyuck's house and Johnny was still ignoring him. Mark spent the rest of his last week of June contemplating whether to unblock Donghyuck on all accounts just to check if he's been doing well. But one encounter with an instagram post showcasing Donghyuck in all his glory on a guys lap had said everything he needed to know.

Silent whispers had been going around the neighborhood, moms claiming Donghyuck was just a lowlife whore at the age of 18 and making their distaste for him known when he walked down the sidewalk carrying a carton of milk with a limp in his delicate steps by making repulsive jokes and faces in his direction.

"you know mark, if you really sat down and thought about how the fuck Donghyuck got the opportunity and money to live in a neighborhood in the middle of downtown Chicago you'd have some answers," Jeno said one day.

Jeno was laying on the roof of Mark's house, a light breeze and the sky turning a beautiful pink above their heads.

"How am I supposed to approach him though? It's not easy approaching someone i basically told to fuck off the same night his father beat the shit out of him," Mark was starting to get angry, his words coming out jumbled together as his eyebrows furrowed closer together.

Jeno let out a scoff, "Jaemin and Renjun told me he's been trying to get better by himself. Said his anxiety had gotten worse so he got pulled out of school permanently."

Mark's felt his heart stop beating. _Donghyuck dropped out of school?_

"What do you mean he dropped out of school? He was the only one in the world to ever be excited to be going to school," Mark replied.

Jeno shook his head as he turned to look at Mark in the eyes," Mark... you were the only purpose for him. He gained courage from you and it got ripped away when you decided to be a prick and leave him alone."

Mark felt his eyes well up with tears. His throat getting clogged as the words repeated in his head _"you made Donghyuck feel as if he was worth something."_


	3. Chapter 3

Mark remembers when he met Donghyuck. They were both entering 6th grade when Donghyuck moved to Chicago from South Korea after financial problems with his parents' company. Donghyuck was small and pudgy, his brown hair filled with soft curls and tan skin prominent against his baby blue sweater.

_"hullo, I'm Lee Donghyuck." A high pitched voice said behind mark._

_The boys around Mark started laughing and pointing at the boy- donghyuck._

_Mark stared at him for a while before smiling and extending his arm out, "I'm Mark Lee."_

 

X

 

The house was dark and silent, Mark didn't know if anyone was home.

_maybe this is just a mistake... i shouldn't even be here_

"You better knock on that damn door Mark Lee," Jeno said from behind him.

Mark groaned and lifted his hand up into a fist, _why are you so nervous? oh yeah, you left him when he needed you the most_

knock  
knock  
mark hesitated for a second   
knock.

Shuffling was heard in the house when the door opened.

Donghyuck.

sweet, beautiful Donghyuck standing in front of mark with a bruise the size of a fist on his right cheek. Donghyuck and his beautiful red hair, standing in front of him with a pained look in his face.

"Oh my god," a voice exclaimed behind Donghyuck.

Jaemin gently nudged Donghyuck to the side and stood in front of him.

"You have no right to show your face here Mark," he began "you can't just pick and choose what days you want to act like a decent human being and what days you want to be a douche."

A sniffle was heard as Donghyuck made his way back to the front and stared up at Mark and Jeno.

"What do _you_ want, Mark?" He said in a soft voice.

"I...I wanted to come check if you were okay... you know because of what happened earlier this week-" he started

"You have no idea what happened this week, Mark. You've probably gotten everything you know from those snobby white women who sit on their patios just to make up bullshit about me so I'd appreciate it if you left right now i don't have anything to say to you," Donghyuck said.

Jeno took hold on Mark's elbow and began to walk them backwards before Mark lost control of his tongue again.

"You know Donghyuck maybe this is why-" Mark's words were interrupted when Jeno slammed a hand onto his mouth and dragged him away.

The last thing he saw was Donghyuck begin to shake, Jaemin bringing him in for a hug as he closed the door.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a little introduction to Taeil and more background on Hyuck.

Donghyuck remembers the way Mark would smile at him as if he was the 8th wonder of the world. Mark was his pillar. He was everything Donghyuck was not. Mark had a loving family and a stable life. Sometimes he wonders what he did to get this fate. One moment he was getting beat by his father while his brother Taeil was laying unconscious on the floor next to him before Johnny barged into the house and the next he was sitting in his room, alone and on the phone with Jaemin crying about how Mark had abruptly blocked his number after witnessing something he wasn't supposed to.

What did Donghyuck do to deserve this fate?

 

 

X

 

 

The sun was going down when Taeil came into his room with a box of cookies and a mug in his hand, sitting down beside him after placing the food on his bedside table and gathering him up into a hug.

"I love you hyuckie, i hope you always remember that i love you so much." Taeil whispered, a tear falling down his cheek and onto Donghyuck shirt as the two of them began to cry.

"I know hyung, i love you too... more than you can imagine." He replied

See, Taeil and Donghyuck live in the house alone and their father was not supposed to be anywhere near them until that one night the cops were called. He had tried to break into their house and attack Taeil. He remembers the way Taeil screamed as the window was smashed, the way he ran into Donghyuck's room and embraced him tightly after locking the door and stuffing themselves into the cramped closet, urging him to contact the police when the floor boards started squeaking beneath their fathers heavy footsteps. That night Johnny had come to their house after speaking with the police, bringing Donghyuck and Taeil close to him and not letting go until the sun rose above the skyscrapers.

_"we'll be friends forever right mark? even when Johnny and Taeil get married we'll still be close and it won't be awkward." Donghyuck said softly, the sand beneath his toes soft as a feather and his head on Mark's shoulder._

_"We will be groomsmen, Hyuck. And then we'll be groomsmen at each others wedding... maybe I'll let you be my child's godfather," Mark replied._

_Donghyuck felt a heavy feeling settle in his stomach._

_'I want you to be my groom and more than a godfather'_

_"Sounds like a plan, Mark!" He said instead._


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this is so short i write my chapters during my gym class and upload them before the period is done, i promise I'll write longer chapters.
> 
> anyway, short introduction to Yukhei (who will have a big role later) and small look into a small argument that grows into something much, much bigger.

His name was Wong Yukhei and he introduced himself as Donghyuck's boyfriend.

Yukhei had walked onto Mark's yard one summer day and introduced himself, big hand stretching out to slap against Mark's back as he laughed.

"May I ask who you are?" Mark had said.

"I'm Wong Yukhei, recently got out of rehab and now comfortably living with my boyfriend over on the house at the end of the street and I'm going around the houses seeing as mostly everyone here knows each other," Yukhei replied.

Mark felt something in his body go cold.

"148?" He said quietly.

Yukhei laughed and nodded, "yup! I live with my boyfriend and his brother."

_why am i feeling like something in my body is going to collapse?_

"Taeil? Your boyfriend is Taeil?"

"uh no... his name is Donghyuck," yukhei replied.

Mark blinked and nodded.

"Be careful with that one."

 

 

X

 

Mark jumped when a loud knock was heard on the front door. He got up from his position on the couch and opened the door.

"You have no fucking right to be going around and telling someone important to me to fucking _be careful with me_ ," Donghyuck said immediately after he opened the door.

"So what Donghyuck? Got a new toy to play with after i let you go?" Mark sneered back.

Donghyuck shut his mouth when his words were finished, staring at Mark with tears in his eyes, "You know... sometimes i wish we were still friends. I miss you so much Mark but you constantly say this shit to me and go around spitting bullshit about me to others and I don't know what the fuck i did to you," 

Mark took a deep breath and looked him in the eye, footsteps becoming clear in the background and he felt a hand rest on his shoulder.

"What are you doing here, Hyuck?" Johnny said.

Donghyuck let out a scoff as he crossed his arms, "telling your brother how to keep business he doesn't know anything about to himself." 

Mark rolled his eyes as he pushed Johnny's hand off his shoulder.

"I'm not here to be your entertainment Donghyuck. If you have a problem with me let it go because we all know that's what you do best." He said.

Donghyuck nodded and stepped off the inside of the house, turning around and running onto the sidewalk in the direction of the park, tears streaming down his face as he let out loud sobs.

_i wish i could have the bravery to tell Mark how i really feel and everything i had hid for both our benefits._


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short filler chapter 🦍

Mark spent the rest of his June in peace and quiet, no Donghyuck to bother his thoughts and no disruptions until _that_ night on July 3rd, a day before the Fourth of July.

He was sitting on the lawn, a joint in between his fingers at 11:23 p.m. when the car parked on the street started shifting back and forth in a fast pace.

"Oh hell no," Mark murmured as he slowly got up from the grass.

A hand slammed onto the back window and a high pitched whine came out from the inside of the car.

_holy shit it's Donghyuck_

Mark was about to walk back into his house when a body came tumbling out of the car, fully clothes and clearly panicking. The boy- now identified as Yukhei- turned around and looked at Mark in the eye as he gently pulled Donghyuck out of the car.

"M-Mark i know the two of you aren't on good terms but he started getting a panic attack and i don't know how to calm him down and he won't stop crying and I'm-" Yukhei was rambling. Mark's eyes widened as he realized the situation.  
They weren't having sex as it looked like, Donghyuck was thrashing around in the middle of his panic attack, something Mark is familiar with seeing.

"Yukhei, hey, calm down it's gonna be fine let him down on the ground gently," Mark despite high managed to remember exactly what to do when Hyuck had one of his episodes. He walked to the car and crouched down in front of Donghyuck.

Donghyuck looked up at Mark with tears in his eyes and quickly wrapped his arms around Mark's neck, burying his head into his arms as he let out loud sobs.

"What happened, Yukhei?" Mark said in a soft voice, hands running up and down Donghyuck's back.

"Uh, we were coming back from movie when i parked but he was asleep so i didn't want to wake him. We were sitting in the car for an hour when he suddenly started thrashing and moving around... as you saw," he replied.

Mark nodded and whispered a faint _nightmare_

"Carry him back home, _lucas."_ Mark sneered.

Yukhei's eyes widened as the sound of his English name. how did mark know it?

"How did-" he began.

Mark chuckled and slowly lifted Donghyuck into his arms and brought him closer to Yukhei.

"I'm not stupid, Yukhei. I know who you are and what you do... i advise you let him go before you hurt him more than i have he's a sensitive person who deserves to be with someone who loves him," 

"So, you?" Yukhei said.

Mark turned away and stepped up the stairs.

_yes, me._


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heterosexual mark?? heterosexual mark? oh my god she's fucking dead.

Mark has always loved Donghyuck. Maybe a love that goes beyond a simple friendship between the two boys. He felt adoration for the younger, a sense of possessiveness that scared him away from coming to terms about how he felt about Lee Donghyuck to the point where he tried anything to push him away and make him hate Mark. Mark didn't understand it at the time, he'd see Johnny and Taeil happy together but then see the other side of it when he witnessed Taeil crying and running out of Johnny's room after a loud argument between the two. Mark was terrified of love.

 

 

X

 

 

The sun was beaming down on Mark with its harsh rays when a nudge interrupted his thoughts.

It's July 15th and Donghyuck is standing next to him.

"Hey," he said.

Mark felt himself choke a little before he replied back with a small "hey."

Donghyuck had a tight lipped smile as he rocked back and forth on his feet, an ice cream cone in his right hand as he nodded.

"How's your summer going?" Donghyuck said.

"Cut to the chase, Hyuck," Mark interrupted.

"I broke up with Yukhei... and i want to say thank you for, you know helping me calm down the other day. I uh, appreciate it a lot," Donghyuck said in a breath.

Mark stayed silent for a minute before letting out a light laugh, "you're welcome hyuck, you know i may... be an asshole but I wouldn't ignore you in a vulnerable time like that, plus we both know i can help calm you down the fastest."

Donghyuck and Mark made eye contact before softly smiling at each other, seagulls screaming in the background as Mark got lost in the brown pools Donghyuck has for eyes. A feeling of guilt and regret filled his being and he quickly looked away, kicking a rock and nodding his head to the beat of his own pounding heart.

"I gotta go then, it was nice talking to you without any problems. bye," Donghyuck said as he backed away and turned around, licking his vanilla ice cream at the same time.

Mark let out the breath he was holding in and crouched down on the concrete... what the fuck just happened?

 

 

X

 

 

Mark wishes he wasn't a coward. He wishes he has the guts to accept that hey, he is gay and that's alright. Johnny is gay and Mark is obviously accepting of it.

 

Growing up in the early 2000s and being exposed to homophobic slurs being seen as casual things in rap songs to celebrities promoting homophobia in a way to brainwash the kids of today. He thought men were supposed to be masculine, no make up or tight clothes that shows off beautiful tan skin and soft curves. Until Donghyuck barged into his life from South Korea with his pororo sweaters and pretty butterfly clips holding his bangs back on his head. Donghyuck and his skinny jeans that hugged him in the right places that made Mark rethink whether all he's learned as a child was correct. Donghyuck and his gold shimmery eyeshadow directing his beautiful smile to mark and mark only. 

Donghyuck was beautiful and he didn't know how to accept it.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO OH MY GOD 
> 
> I know this update is so short but i wanted to put it out, i wrote this while "thinkin bout you" by Katie was playing... whew mark energy 
> 
> I started summer break today so I'll definitely start up this fic!! Thank you for patiently waiting

Lucas- or wong yukhei was like the rest of the boys in their prestigious school. Private, mysterious, and preferred to keep to himself. Or, as private as a drug dealer could try to be. Wong Yukhei was a gorgeous boy who used his looks to convince people to buy his (horrible) drugs for prices higher than what they made people. Donghyuck was a special case for Yukhei, Donghyuck was someone Yukhei was genuine to and kept close.

Mark Lee was his ex best friend.

family class and different futures drifted them apart and eventually Donghyuck got stuck in the middle of it all as they pulled him left and right.

 

X

 

_  
"Do you still talk to Yukhei?" Mark asked._

_"Sometimes i do... i mostly hit him up for some weed nowadays though, why do you ask?"_

_Mark thought for a moment.. why did he ask?_

_"No reason... was just curious that's all," he replied._

_Donghyuck snickered from his side of the bed and slowly lifted up on his elbows, head turning to look at Mark's face._

_"Mark you know you're my day one right? yukhei will never get between us, nor will i ever try to get with him. Bros before hoes," Donghyuck said the last 3 words with a light laugh._

_Mark rolled his eyes and propped up on his elbows, too._

_"Same here hyuck, we'll never drift apart."_

__

 

X

 

Yukhei and his too long perfect legs. Donghyuck and his beautiful toothy smile.

It mocked Mark Lee.

Mark sighed and looked away from the couple. The memories of a past conversation with Donghyuck appearing in his mind as the deep giggles mixed with a beautiful high pitched voice.

"I want you so much i don't know how to explain it."


End file.
